Everyone stop what you’re doing and take note: Old Spice High Endurance Deodorant has a new look coming soon! I don’t know what exactly the new look is going to be, but I am sure my day will become enriched and more exciting as a result.
You say you don’t care? Well, someone at Old Spice does because I’ve been noticing the chirpy and cryptic “NEW LOOK SOON!” stickers affixed right where you can notice them up close and personal. Apparently we should not expect any new product enhancements to make the modern man feel more fresh and vibrant, just a mysterious new look.
Evidently Old Spice considers itself in the same league as an automaker or a hotel that builds excitement for a makeover or a new design. But in the early morning, when I’m barely conscious of being awake, I’m not quite sure I’m ready to genuflect on a new look for a roll-on deodorant.
Someone please get Old Spice Guy on the case here.